"is this chair free?" "who's jeffrey?"
9:23 p.m. - March 27, 2003
tomorrow night i'm going out on a double double date (or a quadruple date if you prefer) with sooz, the pretty ballerina and liz (and their various gentleman friends). in theory, despite the fact that i've been one half of a relationship for as long as i can remember, i think couples are dull and boring people to hang out with. in practice, some of the most fun people i know come as a two person package.
5:32 p.m. - March 27, 2003
my doctor once told me about a new patient of his who had come to him for help with what she thought was Seasonal Affective Disorder. it turned out that she wasn't suffering from SAD after all. she was actually suffering from "regular" depression but because she was taking meds for six months at a time and then feeling ok for 6 months after she came off them it just looked like she was having the whole winter blues deal.
i thought about this yesterday when i was trying to work out why in the last few weeks i'd suddenly started feeling depressed again and why, even though i've not been anywhere near a gym for at least a fortnight (and i've been eating a serious amount of unhealthy foodage) i'd suddenly lost more than 4 pounds in weight. its been about 7 months since i came of the meds and only now am i really free of it.
my boss told me i looked good today. its a shame that in order to look better i have to feel worse. i guess freedom comes with a price.
2:30 p.m. - March 27, 2003
i know a lot of people who are refusing to talk about the war or to watch the events in iraq as they unfold daily on our tv screens. i have no problem voicing my confused opinions on this matter and, despite the ways of my youth, i'm now of the belief that hiding your head in the sand is not going to make all the bad things go away. however, i have been avoiding putting my thoughts and feelings about the war in my diary for all to see. today i read this diary and it seems i don't really have to say anything because this person more or less expressed my pattern of thoughts (thanks renita). what she didn't say was that the people who are still campaigning against the war should probably quit fighting a battle they can't win (excuse the pun) and use their energies to help the people of iraq in a more realistic way. the people of iraq need food and medical aid (they did long before the war even started) so instead of standing around with banners and candles in their hands why don't they do something that will really help.
12:36 p.m. - March 27, 2003
the powers that be ("PTB") called a staff meeting first thing this morning. it was scheduled as a 30 minute session but we were still freezing our butts off in the boardroom two hours later. a lot of things were said. a lot of things were said that i didn't understand. however, i did come away with the useful knowledge that my job was still secure for at least another year, maybe two.
after the meeting my boss smiled at me and said "now you can go to vietnam without worrying about anything". i could...if most of asia wasn't in a panic about a deadly disease for which they can't find a cure. the weekend will involve a trip to our travel agent to try and sort out what we can do to refrain from losing half of the $3450 we have paid for the flights.
11:37 a.m. - March 27, 2003
i've been in canada for well over 2 years now but even though i've bought my own home and i've made lots of great new friends and i've been working in the same office for what seems like forever i still sometimes feel like i'm not really a part of things.
8:56 a.m. - March 27, 2003
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