i don't know why but thoughts of work leave me feeling very on edge and uncomfortable. i'm hoping that the imminent move followed by the trip to england and spain will focus my thoughts in another more serene direction. i also keep telling myself that if i hadn't kicked the caffeine habit i would probably be feeling a whole lot worse. in addition to the tea reeducation, i'm trying to put more thought into our eating habits but it's not easy to deal with meals when half your kitchen is packed in boxes and you aren't replacing stocks of food until you move.
we went for a walk before bed last night and i told the cg that i feel like my current life is just a continuous loop of going to work and coming home and going to bed. i am socializing (last week i had liz, husband and baby over for dinner one night and i met diana for a lunchtime stroll) but i still feel a bit distant from what's going on around me. days are just blurring together. it all seems a bit pointless. however i just read in my book about some french scientists who spent 9 years in the inhospitable peruvian mountains doing some research only to find that some other french bloke got the results first by going to switzerland (in addition the results were opposite to what they were expecting to prove). what a fucking waste of life that was...for those who did survive not to mention those who didn't.
9:21 p.m. - April 20, 2005
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