today is going much better than yesterday. this morning we went to a singing session at the library, then met a friend and her son for hot chocolate, had a picnic lunch on the living room floor and now we are hanging out on the couch watching ice age 3. (i'm really happy that G is finally at the stage where she will watch a movie with us - although so far all we have watched is ice age 1,2 and 3!). yesterday did not go quite this well. the morning was fine. we had a christmas party with santa and a bouncy castle and a few too many christmas cupcakes. it went downhill from there. by dinner time i was frazzled and frayed at the edges, and fucking up dinner (there was an incident with a steaming saucepan that i couldn't even begin to explain) was more or less the last straw. or rather, trying to get G to sit and eat her dinner and stop asking for more butter was the tipping point. i ended up shoving her back into her chair and verbally reprimanding her until she cried. to be fair (to me) she does cry quite a bit but i knew i'd been a bit too harsh and had to sit her on my knee and apologise to her. i felt even worse when she stroked my cheek and said "don't worry mama, we can buy you a new pan". i guess it all turned out ok in the end and days like that are few and far between but you really appreciate days like today after days like yesterday.
1:06 p.m. - December 16, 2010
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