i met renita for lunch in the butterfly garden cafe on georgia. i haven't seen her since the danny michel gig at the railway club and i'm not sure i've ever seen her when i'm sober. it felt good to get out into the sunshine and it felt good to talk about something that doesn't involve thoughts of "woe is me".
note to self: lighten (the fuck) up
1:37 p.m. - January 09, 2003
on my way to work this morning i saw a girl in perhaps her late teens slam down a street phone and start to cry. i wanted to ask her if she was ok but i was so close to tears myself that i just couldn't so i walked past feeling even more like shit. i'm not doing too good at the moment. i'm doing all the things i should be to have a happy healthy life but there are times when it feels like i'm drowning in stuff. i buy stuff, i do stuff, i read stuff and some days it seems like i'm doing all this just to stop me feeling stuff.
give me a problem i can deal with. give me something tangible that i can find a solution for. don't give me this feeling of emotional drowning.
8:45 a.m. - January 09, 2003
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